Monday, September 16, 2013

Confessions of Football's Grim Reaper

I tried not to take it personally.  But lately, it's hard to ignore it.  I am the Grim Reaper for football teams.  My support slays any chance they have at successful seasons - bowl games, the playoffs - and forget the biggie - the Super Bowl!!!

Take this last week...who did I want to win?  Everybody who didn't.  They all failed, some spectacularly, some not with a bang but a whimper.

I've loved football most of my life.  It was inevitable.  My dad was the quarterback of the State Championship football team when he was in high school.  We started going to the high school games in the town where we lived when I was about twelve years old.  In Garland, Texas in those days, Friday nights were all about the Garland High School games.  Didn't matter if they played in the rickety all-wooden stadium (where I got some big honking splinters in unmentionable places, especially when I was in the drill team and sat unaware in my little short skirts.) Or if the bulk of the town's residents drove in a winding caravan all over north Texas in heat, wind, rain, whatever.  Nothing was more important than football.  Yep, Friday Night Lights, though it was written about one of our arch-rivals in playoffs, Odessa Permian High School, was real all over the state.  That's the way it was.

In those days, Garland only had one high school.  They got their second when I was a junior.  We had the option to move to the new high school if we wanted, but no way would I do that...I mean, did they think I would give up years of tradition?  No way, no how.  Would I give up being a Dashing Deb to become a Southern Belle? was totally unthinkable.  Dad thought about sending me to a prestigious private school, but I BEGGED him not to ruin my life!

So is it any wonder that I am a football fan?  In the glory days of Garland, we won the state championship two years in a row, beating Odessa Permian to get to the final game, I should mention.

With that foundation, I have loved football ever since.  My main teams are the Dallas Cowboys and the University of Texas Longhorns.  I also like Texas A&M, if they're not playing the Longhorns, and the Jacksonville Jaguars.  (I mean I live in Jax, after all...)

But this season is not turning out well for the Longhorns, the Cowboys, and especially the Jaguars.  On Saturday, even Johnny Football couldn't pull off a win against Alabama.  I couldn't watch it when they got so far behind, but my dad assured me it was a really good game.  BUT DID THEY WIN?!!!  NO!!!!!  The Cowboys handily beat the Giants in the first game of the real season.  Yesterday, they lost to Kansas City (who had the nerve to sneak in Andy Reid as their new coach...)

Ahem...the Longhorns, well they're not even in the rankings anymore this season...I swear I saw Bevo crying on the sidelines.  Or maybe he was chewing his cud, or the rope that held him in place.  I don't blame him, I'd try to escape the madness, too.  It must be hard to stand before 90,000+ fans in that heat and noise.  It would be much nicer to be munching grass in a field somewhere.

So I have come to the inevitable conclusion, in the "Superstition" mode (thanks, Stevie Wonder).  IT'S MY FAULT!!!  I'M TO BLAME!!!  I must be, otherwise why are all my teams losing?

I have come up with a plan.  I've decided to advertise a special service in which I will cheer for the opponents of my customers' teams.  That way, their teams will win...I haven't worked out the particulars yet, but I will...I can be clever when necessary...

Take care. 

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